


Hearts Explained

by vi_mexa



Series: Hearts Explained [2]
Category: Kingdom Hearts
Genre: Alcohol, Other Additional Tags to Be Added
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-05-30
Updated: 2019-04-25
Packaged: 2019-05-16 00:35:43
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 10,065
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14800962
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/vi_mexa/pseuds/vi_mexa
Summary: Events and side-stories running concurrently with the main 'Means to an End' storyline.





	1. Workplace Competition

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Presented in vignette style for brevity.
> 
> Prompt: After talking with Xemnas, Saïx knew they needed to up the quota of either hearts collected by member, or people recruited by member. He expressed this to Axel bc they're super sneaky and secret and Axel suggested he start a member of the month campaign which Saïx begrudgingly agreed to since Xemnas overheard the idea.

Saix sighed as he flipped through his paperwork. He had been talking with Xemnas earlier about their progress….and it was not going as well as they had hoped. As frustrating as it may have been for Xemnas, it was doubly so for Saix. It’s hard to sabotage something that isn’t doing well in the first place. Something needed to happen and he knew that either everyone needed to work harder or they needed more help. Neither one of those things seemed likely to happen and he grimaced as he stared the the wall. As much as he didn’t really want to ask for help on this one, it was necessary.

He wanted Axel’s input on this since he was technically in on the plan too, but it seemed wrong asking for help when he felt responsible for the whole mess. But as long as Axel was willing to keep doing the legwork for this plan, he may as well see if he’s got any ideas.

“Why not a contest,” suggested Axel.

Saix, not wanting to completely shut down this idea - he did ask, after all - hesitantly spoke. “What is there to offer for incentive? We have nothing.”

“Ah,” began Axel, “but what is everyone here thirsty for?”

Saix stared in confusion at the redhead and shook his head.

Axel raised his hands in a shrug. “Man, you don’t even know? You’re out for it, too.”

Irritated, Saix pinched the bridge of his nose and closed his eyes. “Do you plan on telling me or do I have to guess?”

“The answer’s really quite simple if you think about it. Recognition.”

Saix’s eyes widened, processing the possible ramifications of ‘recognition’. After a moment of consideration his expression fell flat. “You mean to tell me that you’re suggesting a ‘nobody of the month’ club?”

Unfortunately for Saix, at that moment Xemnas rounded the corner and overheard the statement. He sidled up to the other two members with his usual imposing grace.

“This is your plan to remedy the current situation,” he asked, his sonorous voice almost daring them to say otherwise.

Axel quickly piped up. “Yep! Winner gets their picture on the wall in the grey room and everything!”

Horror flashed across Saix’s face. This was _definitely_ not what he had intended to happen but what could he do now? Contradicting this wouldn’t work, not after Axel’s _wonderful_ addition to the conversation. Nothing to do now but accept that this was going to happen.

“Excellent. I’ll bring it up at the next meeting,” Xemnas said and turned to Saix. “When is that?”

 _Of course he doesn’t know. When does he keep track of anything?_ “Six days from now.” That would at least give him time to prepare for what would inevitably be the worst thing ever to happen to this ragtag group.

“I trust the two of you will keep this quiet until then,” Xemnas spoke again, waiting for confirmation.

“Of course,” said Saix curtly.

“Wouldn’t dream of it,” accompanied Axel.

Xemnas turned on his heel and left, leaving Saix to struggle internally with his desire to punch Axel.

“Nice,” drawled Axel, “Now what’s the rest of the plan?”

Yes, definitely a struggle.

 

* * *

 

“This month,” Xemnas explained, “you will be awarded points based on the number of hearts collected and members recruited. At the end of the month all points will be tallied and the person with the most will be the ‘member of the month’ and have their portrait put up in the grey room until the next month when the points will be counted again.”

Most of the Organization members began darting their eyes around the room, sizing up their competitors based on current chair heights. Xemnas couldn’t be happier if he tried; the fact that people were going to be actively working towards his goal was enough to reverse all that sleep he’d been missing out on the past few weeks.

He portaled out of the meeting room and into his office and let out a sigh. Was it relief? Perhaps pleasure? He wasn’t sure what to call it but he was eagerly awaiting the results of this ‘contest’.

 

* * *

 

Saix left the room not long after Xemnas but with a decidedly different mood. With everyone supposedly going out and working on collecting hearts there was no way to guarantee his spot at the top. Unless….he worked even harder; not something he wanted to think about doing.

 _Does Axel even realize what he’s done to our plan?_ He sat down on his bed and wiped his hands down his face _. Sure, it means less time waiting to hijack this place but if there’s a possibility I won’t stay second-in-command it’s useless. Ah, fuck._

He ungracefully fell backwards onto the mattress and threw his arms out on either side. Sometimes you just need to stare at the ceiling for a while to recollect yourself.

 

* * *

 

Vexen was quick to leave the room and head back to his lab, ideas already flooding his head on how well this could go over for him. In his mind it was so much more than a simple contest, it was his chance at proving his rank to the younger nobodies.

 _Everyone would have to acknowledge my seniority; I would be getting the recognition I deserve!_ He quickly set to plan out how exactly he would maximize his time spent between research and heart collecting.

 

* * *

 

Luxord took a minute to leave; he sat and looked at the chair heights as they were and his lips pulled back into a sardonic half-smile.

 _I go out twice a week and I’m at a respectable distance from the top. I’m willing to bet that if I went on an extra trip each week I can stay right where I am_ . He laughed to himself as he imagined everyone’s shock to see him still hanging around the castle _and_ retaining his chair position. Who needs people to look at their portrait when you can revel in their stunned faces?

 

* * *

 

 _Yesyesyesyesyesyes. YES!_ Demyx thought as he whirled down the stairs, trying to get to his room as fast as he could to formulate some plan of attack. But when he got there and looked at his desk his mood dropped through the floor. _Fuck. FuckfuckfuckfuckFUCK._ Paperwork: his least favorite thing ever.

He picked up a few of the half-filled forms and flipped through them. The more missions he went out on meant more paperwork to file. But going out and beating heartless was the important part, right? _As long as I get the most, I’ll win! Paperwork sucks but as long as my numbers are high nothing else matters!_

Giggling quietly to himself, he picked up the most filled-out forms and started completing them in his usual brief manner. _Oh, the look on Saix’s face when he sees he can’t yell at me….priceless._

 

* * *

 

Xigbar listened half-heartedly to Xemnas’ droning on about the usual activities around the castle. He didn’t understand why Xemnas still held these. _Not like we haven’t run the same gauntlet over and over for the past 5 years or anything._ Maybe it was to make people think that there’s actually a plan in the works….  
_I mean, there’s totally a plan._ He quickly straightened himself in his chair. _Yep. Plan. We got one of those.... But damn, it’s_ slow _._

He perked up again when he heard the word “contest” and fully brought his attention back to the present. _Ohhh, now we’re talkin’._

 _I really don’t feel like fighting or finding any more heartless….but bringing in new members?_ That _is something that’ll put some life back in this place_. Things had been pretty stagnant around the castle if Xemnas’ incredibly redundant meetings were any indication.

He’d just go out, find a few nobodies, and bring them back here; no fighting, no extra work. Just walk around, scoop them up, give them to Xemnas. Simple, yet effective. Chances are that at least one of the beings he brings back will have a sense of humor….

 

* * *

 

He had kept a straight face during the meeting but as soon as Marluxia left to return to his room, a wicked grin the size of Vexen’s easily injured pride spread across his face. _Why steal the power when you can earn it in front of everyone? Let everyone know that you’re one of the best and they’ll flock to you._

Yes, this was going to skyrocket his little campaign to the point where he would gain so much momentum that not even Xemnas could stop him.

 

* * *

 

It was two weeks into the competition and Xemnas called everyone for a progress meeting. A few nervous glances were exchanged before everyone entered Where Nothing Gathers and upon arrival, there were a number of gasps.  


Zexion was close to horrified as he looked two seats over and was greeted with a solid pillar. His eyes followed it upwards to see Demyx smugly perched at the top. Xaldin wasn’t far behind Zexion with his shocked reaction, only just managing to stifle his noise of surprise.

Lexaeus looked around the room and found that both Zexion and Vexen were very near the bottom even after the work they put in and wondered if they had even bothered picking up the pace.

Xigbar was considerably lower than usual and didn’t seem to mind; he was even mildly entertained by Demyx’s new position.

Saix found himself still situated in what could be called the middle but when he looked down to see who was flagging he found exactly who he didn’t want to see— Axel. He was in dead last and seemed none too concerned with that fact.

The last development that no one expected was that Luxord of all people was sitting in a comfortable third place after Demyx and Marluxia.

Xemnas made a brief - for him, at least - speech about how pleased he was to see people making the additional effort and eventually handed off the proverbial torch to Saix to address some concerns that had arisen.

“Xigbar,” Saix spoke sternly, even more so than usual.  
  
The man called out nonchalantly turned his head up towards Saix’s new position. “Yeah?”

“You can’t bring in every Nobody you find; half of them didn’t even make it to the castle,” he continued to berate Xigbar out of frustration. “Out of the six so far, only one showed the slightest amount of promise.”

 _Man, way to be a downer. I thought a few were decent….jeez._ Xigbar shifted in his seat. “Right, I hear ya. Only _real_ good ones from now on.” Did he mean it? Probably not, but it would get Saix off of him for the time being.

Not quite satisfied with the response he had received but sure he wasn’t going to get one any better, Saix moved on and grimaced at how far up he had to look to address the next person. “Demyx. Your reports are still not up to par—”

Demyx perked up upon hearing his name next to ‘your reports’ and not followed by ‘are late’ and completely blocked out everything Saix was saying. He just smiled and gave him a wink and a thumbs up, ridiculously pleased with his own work.

Rolling his eyes, Saix turn toward Xemnas and nodded, signalling that he was through with what he felt needed to be covered. Xemnas gave a curt nod back and adjourned the meeting.

 

* * *

 

Zexion went back to his room feeling somehow slightly worse than usual. Hadn’t he done enough to keep above Lexaeus at least? How could Demyx be so far ahead? Where the hell did Luxord even _come_ from?

He pouted as he weighed his options, picking up a book he’d carelessly tossed on the floor a few days back and started reading. _If I’m already that far behind, there’s no point in me trying to overwork myself to catch up. I get what I get._

He sat down in his too-big armchair with a _fwump_ and resigned himself to his fate— at least reading was interesting and he could gain something from that.

 

* * *

 

Xaldin sped back to his room in a cold sweat. There’s no way he could be losing to Demyx and Luxord; Marluxia was almost respectable but the other two? No. No, he would definitely have to do something about this.

 _Like question the mustachioed blonde about how he managed to loaf around but still take third place._ And maybe give up a few hours of his already short sleeping time to go out and do more work. Surely that’s how the others were getting so much done; they just did it while most everyone else was asleep. _Yes, that’s it. I can still function on three hours’ sleep if I budget my time correctly…._

 

* * *

 

Larxene had managed to hold it together during the meeting but once she got to her room she wasn’t sure if she wanted to punch something or burst into tears.

_Dammit, I tried and I’m still getting showed up! I tried so hard; what the hell is wrong with these freaks? The one woman here and I can’t seem to get my foot in the door no matter what I do! FUCK!_

“Smad.” The word fell from her lips forlornly; a bit of what she wished she could feel instead of just remember the act of ‘sad’ and ‘mad’ and going through the motions. She let out a melodramatic sigh to wipe her emotional slate clean and started thinking.

_Well I’m beating Xigbar and Axel….wait. I’m beating out Axel? Aw man. He’s never gonna respond to my flirting if I beat him. Why’s he so low anyway? Isn’t Saix like constantly on his ass to get him moving?_

 

* * *

 

“Just what do you think you’re doing,” hissed Saix.

Axel only shrugged. _Yeah, it’d be nice to make people look at my smug face every day for a month but man is it not worth the trouble these guys are making it out to be._

“I figured it’d be rude if I used my prior knowledge of the contest to get ahead so I’m letting everyone else have their fun first before I jump in.”

Both men knew it was a complete lie but oh, how Saix wanted to believe it for his own sake.

 

* * *

 

Lexaeus went to a small communal area in one of the far wings; he along with Vexen and Zexion had made it into a small office library of sorts. He didn’t find either of them there and figured they were off in their rooms moping about how poorly they’re apparently doing.

That put the man in a tough moral situation; on one hand, he’s glad to be helping the Organization achieve its goals but on the other, he feels bad leaving his friends behind. _Not really friends, per se, but people I don’t mind spending free time with and who will certainly never let it go if I leave them behind._

With a slight decline of his head and slump of his shoulders he huffed and sat down next to a small table piled high with paperback books. He closed his eyes and shook his head before schooling his face back into an unreadable expression.

 _They had better appreciate this._ He knew they wouldn’t, but he couldn’t bring himself to outdo them so greatly. He reached out and grabbed one of the books and started diligently working on one of the crossword puzzles within.

 

* * *

 

It was only a few days before the end of the month and Xemnas was becoming quite tired of Xigbar’s antics of continuing to bring back every. Single. Nobody. He. Found. Saix’s admonishing had done nothing to curb his behavior and unluckily for Xemnas, he was the one who had to deal with the ‘new members’.

He was exhausted and slightly sleep-deprived as he -ungracefully- walked down the hall,sipping from a mug of coffee. He turned the corner only to find Luxord smiling like the cat that ate the canary, shrugging while Xaldin questioned him very harshly but very quietly, spears pinning Luxord to the spot.

 _Odd._ Xemnas took a moment to break them up, shook his head, and continued to his office.

 

* * *

 

Later that day Xemnas called an impromptu meeting to try and rally his subordinates one last time before the month is over. Halfway through his monologue, a single relatively loud snort echoed through the room and he angrily looked down at everyone.

_Who would be so bold, yet stupid...._

Everyone else was also looking around for what made the noise— thankfully for Xaldin, he doesn't snore but the noise did happen to wake him up as well. Suddenly all attention was on Axel as he tried to suppress laughter while pointing across from him.

Demyx was completely asleep on his chair, drooling a bit.

Xemnas loudly called out his name to wake him up and immediately adjourned the meeting.

 

* * *

 

Saix walked into the kitchen to grab a snack, hoping it would push him through the last of this horrendous paperwork. He stopped in the doorway, shocked at what he found.

Drinking coffee straight out of the pot, Xemnas stood there, obviously still fuming over what had happened earlier.

Saix thought better of his quick snack and quietly backed out, pretending he was never there. He would have to find Axel later and pummel him because this contest certainly wasn't making his job any easier.

 

* * *

 

The last day of the month finally arrives and most people couldn’t be happier to see the end of this-- especially Xemnas. Once everyone had gathered he made a quick note that this would be the first and last time the contest would occur before allowing the seats to settle to their final levels.

Xemnas, of course, remained at the top, followed by Marluxia, Demyx, Xaldin, Luxord, Saix, Larxene, Lexaeus, Xigbar, Zexion, Axel, and finally Vexen.

Demyx, outraged at his second place spot, nearly stood up on his chair. “What,” he demanded, “How could that work?!”

Saix threw a glare in his direction. “Two weeks ago I told you you needed to write more neatly so I could read your reports and you didn’t,” he stated coldly. “Marluxia won by default.”

Marluxia’s face twitched slightly at that but he held his composure and made sure to give Demyx the best sympathetic smile he could muster. _Default isn’t what I wanted but I’ll take it._

Xaldin breathed a sigh of relief that he didn’t fall too far and can now work on returning his now-ruined sleep schedule to something a bit more normal.

Lexaeus and Zexion both exchanged a quick glance at each other and then to Vexen, who was sitting in his seat, quite deflated. They knew he’ll be completely inconsolable and likely unbearable for about a week while Marluxia parades himself around.

Demyx, now prepared to cry for two reasons, swore that from then on, all of his sitar playing would be out of tune and promised to time it just as people were supposed to be falling asleep. Aside from losing, he had accidentally proven himself capable of taking on more work, which Saix would be sure to dump on him.

Likewise, Luxord was under the same amount of Saix’s scrutiny as he had made all the work he did seem effortless. _An unintended consequence of being too flashy….Next time I’ll hide my hand a bit better._

Larxene left the meeting feeling somewhat better than she had two weeks ago. _I kept at it and it actually paid off….whaddaya know…. Sure, Axel looks like a total loser and he’ll probably want nothing to do with me but I’ll gladly take halfway when it comes to these jerks._

For a minute she wished her hair was just a bit longer so she could give a little hair flip as she walked down the hall.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a prequel to the main story; Drel happens to be one of the last Nobodies that Xigbar brings in.


	2. Late-night thoughts

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A little interaction between dramatically suspicious members Marluxia and Drelmexa.

It was late at night and Drelmexa and Marluxia sat in the grey area, being civil but still keeping a wary eye on one another. Both were lounged on opposite couches, lazily regaling each other with their triumphs of the week. They had already discussed their recent mission objectives and how they planned to spend the next week but there was still a fair amount of tension hanging in the air.

Drelmexa gave the rest of the room a cursory glance and leaned forward towards Marluxia’s couch. “You wanna get something to drink,” she quietly asked.

Suspicious of the sudden nicety, he narrowed his eyes and sat up straighter. “Like what? Certainly you don’t mean your disgustingly bitter excuse for coffee.”

“No,” she shook her head, “if I had that now I’d never sleep—”

“Not like you do that anyway,” Marluxia interjected.

Drel pursed her lips in a half-frown and crossed her arms. “I meant something a little stiffer. I’ve been missing alcohol lately and I just so happened to pick up a few things last week but haven’t found a good time to enjoy them.”

“Oh really?” Marluxia cocked an eyebrow. “Well….If you’re offering,” he chuckled.

He stood up and let Drelmexa lead the way into the kitchen. She dropped to the floor and started rearranging some of the pots and pans in the bottom cupboards.

Marluxia couldn’t keep himself from laughing out loud at her hiding spot. “That’s where you keep your things?”

Without looking up from the cupboard she answered, “It’s not like anyone ever uses these things, I might as well.”

“I’ll give you that,” he hummed.

Drel poked her head back out of the cabinet and looked to Marluxia. “You got a preference?”

“Hmm, I’m not sure. What are you having?”

“I’ve got a bottle specifically for myself but I’ll let you have a bit if you’d like. It’s a mix of vodka and wine.”

“You plan on drinking an entire bottle yourself,” scoffed Marluxia. “I was wondering where your barbaric personality went and what do you know, I just found it again.”

“I’m going to pretend I didn’t hear that last part but yes, I have a very high alcohol tolerance and I could drink more than that if I felt like it,” she said matter-of-factly.

“Hm, I’m more of a daiquiri person, myself, but I’ll settle for a nice amaretto.”

Drelmexa pulled out two bottles, one significantly smaller than the other. “You’re in luck, I just so happen to have a bit.”

“You’re not expecting me to drink out of the bottle are you,” he laughed.

“That’s up to you.” She slid the bottle of amaretto across the counter towards him. “I’ll probably be using a regular cup but if you want to count your liquor or challenge me, I’ve got a few shotglasses back there.”

“I won’t challenge you but grab two shotglasses and a cup for yourself.”

“Two? You planning on doubling,” Drelmexa laughed dryly as she reached for two small glasses.

Much to her surprise, Marluxia joined her in laughing. “No, I’d like us to each do shots of the other’s preferred liquor.”

“Hm, what was that,” she asked in mock surprise. “I thought I heard something vaguely friendly come out of your mouth but I must be wrong.”

“Friendly? No,” he continued sarcastically, “You must have misheard me.”

Drel set the two glasses down on the counter and turned to grab a regular sized cup which she placed next to her bottle. “Ah, I figured as much.”

Marluxia took both of the shotglasses and carefully poured the almond liqueur into each and slid one over to the other side of the counter.

“Thanks,” said Drel as she raised her glass. “Nice driveway.” With that she downed the liquor and her nose scrunched at the burn left in her throat. It had definitely been a while since her last drink.

Meanwhile, Marluxia had nearly spit his drink out. “Excuse me? What did you say?”

She turned to him and smiled. “Oh, right. Old habits die hard.” She grabbed her bottle and shook it a little before pouring it into the two glasses. “Something we used to toast at family gatherings. Supposed to be ‘na zdravi’ but once you’re about eight drinks in, it turns into ‘nice driveway’.

He hummed in response and raised his glass up to his face to watch the shimmering purple liquid as it swirled around. “Not that I haven’t seen weirder,” Marluxia began, “but you’re sure this is safe to drink?”

“Of course,” scoffed Drel. “I wouldn’t have a litre and half if it wasn’t!”

“My mistake,” joked Marluxia and he quickly emptied his glass. “Hmm, that is an interesting flavor. It’s sweet but still burns.”

“Yep. Watch out though, it’s strong enough that the people I used to drink with would get sick after about four shots. We bought it because it looked pretty but in the end I wound up drinking almost all of it on my own.”

Marluxia huffed. “Don’t worry, I won’t be drinking any more of it. I’ll stick to the more predictable liquor.”

“You want me to count for you, or d’you got it,” Drelmexa asked as she poured a generous amount of the glittery liquor into her cup and started sipping away.

Marluxia wasn’t sure whether to be offended or touched by her offer. “I’ll take care of myself, thank you.”

Drelmexa only shrugged. “Suit yourself; figured I’d ask just in case.”

It didn’t take long for the two of them to get through half of their respective bottles, their posture being the only outward indication of how much they had been drinking. Drelmexa was leaning in the corner of where the wall-to-wall counters met, elbows on either side holding her up. Marluxia was leaning over the island counter, his head resting in his hand.

“You know who’s got a figure,” Drelmexa suddenly asked. “Vexen. Have you seen that waistline?”

“But he’s skinny,” protested Marluxia. “There’s nothing else to notice.”

Drel raised an eyebrow and pointed with the hand that held her drink. “He’s got hips though— that’s the only reason you notice the waist. And he’s oddly tall….”

“So what? I’ve got hips.”

“Mar. You’re built like a brick. You’ve got a noticeable waistline but that waist-to-hip ratio ain’t got nothin on Vexen’s.” She went to take another drink but noticed her glass was empty and went to refill it. “You and Xemnas are kinda the same like that.”

Marluxia squinted. “Same like what?”

“Meatbricks. Ya look good but you’re a rectangle.”

“Is that a compliment,” he asked before taking another shot.

“Well I said ya looked good, so yeah. I’ve never seen your arms but you swing that bigass scythe around so you’re probably not noodly.” Drelmexa groggily looked at the counter for a place to set her cup down but couldn’t decide on a place to put it; she stood there staring at the counter for a minute before Marluxia walked over, took her glass, and set it down in front of her.

“Mmm hey, _and_ you’re tall,” she said as she turned to face him. “Thanks for that, by the way. Sometimes the brain stops working for a few. I can read in German real good though.”

“You looked mildly stupid and I couldn’t leave you like that. What if someone walked in only to find the newest member completely stumped by the existence of a full counter,” Marluxia exaggerated as he leaned on the counter closer to where Drel was.

“It’s 2am, who the fuck’s gonna walk in here?”

“With your awful luck? Xemnas,” he said, pouring himself another drink in the process. “Oh!” His face contorted in disgust. “Or _Xigbar_. He’d be one to show up here.”

“Xemnas….” she drawled thoughtfully, “might be the one to show up because yeah, that _is_ my luck. But nah, Xig’s real sleepy. Snores like a chainsaw. Walked past his room once— it was bad.”

“ _That’s_ a noodly man if I ever saw one,” Marluxia said, unexpectedly swaying forward a little more than he wanted to with his emphasis.

Drelmexa put her hand to his chest and pushed him back upright. “Now see, I still have my balance and coordination,” she explained, “but my depth perception’s out the window— good thing you were close or I wouldn’t’ve caught you.”

“Pffft,” snorted Marluxia. “With your noodle arms I’m surprised you did.”

 _Of all the phrases to drunkenly hone in on…._ Putting one hand on her hip, Drel pouted. “I do _not_ have noodle arms! I’ve been working on them since I got here!”

“You know who surprisingly _doesn’t_ have noodle arms,” Marluxia whispered.

Drelmexa’s eyebrows knitted together and she shook her head.

“Vexen,” he exclaimed excitedly before almost immediately falling back into an incredibly serious expression. Suddenly confused, he questioned, “Why does he have everything?”

Drel let out a particularly loud bark of laughter at his expense but looked back to Marluxia. “Wait, really?”

She thought she heard him mutter something but before she could continue questioning him, another voice caught her attention.

“Drelmexa! What are you doing up at this hour,” asked Vexen, in all his not-brick, not-noodly glory.

Her hand flew to her mouth and she stuttered while she tried to figure out how to respond. “What’re _you_ doing up,” she countered with an obviously baffled expression.

Marluxia stood there, staring hard at Vexen, completely lost in his own thoughts.

Vexen looked between the two of them cautiously before answering Drelmexa. “I’m getting myself a cup of coffee before going back to my work. Now, really, what are you doing? For you to be so rambunctious is….” he trailed off as his eyes wandered the counter and saw the alcohol. “Oh. I see. _He_ dragged you into it, no doubt?”

She pursed her lips and looked off to the side. “No….it was all me,” she muttered. “It’s been more than four months since I had any and I kinda missed it. Mar just happened to be in the immediate vicinity when I started so I asked him if he wanted to join.”

Unsure of how to handle this situation, Vexen grimaced and turned to the cabinets in search of the coffee grounds so that maybe he could just pretend he never encountered this mess.

“MY GOD YOU’RE RIGHT,” shouted Marluxia, startling both Drelmexa and Vexen. Vexen had been so surprised by the outburst that he dropped the - thankfully still sealed - bag of coffee.

Drel’s eyes flew wide open and she pointed at Marluxia. “Sweet glutinous rice, do not start that right now!”

“What?!” was all Vexen managed to confusedly croak out as he slowly picked up his dropped item, never taking his eyes off Marluxia.

Whatever shred of sobriety she had left kicked in and Drel found herself capping Marluxia’s amaretto and slamming the stopper into her own bottle before throwing them back into the cupboard she pulled them from.

“We can discuss this elsewhere,” she hissed at the pink-haired man who looked like he was on the brink of tears. “I’m gonna take Mar back to his room,” Drel explained to Vexen as she tried ushering Marluxia out of the kitchen before he could say anything too damning.

“Are you sure you can make it,” asked Vexen as he watched her stumble away from him.

“Nope.”

A concerned frown marred Vexen’s normally expressionless features which he was quick to cover up with a moderate amount of disgust. “I want you back in here before my coffee’s done; you’ve got dishes to clean up.”

“Yep.”

Vexen shook his head at her short responses and continued making his late-night/early-morning coffee.

Leaning on each other for support, Drel guided Marluxia to his room and, with some whined protests and a few tripping incidents, made sure he stayed there. She had to promise him that they would pick the conversation back up tomorrow before he let her leave to go clean and put the glasses away.

Vexen was waiting for her in the kitchen, mug of coffee in hand. He stood there patiently sipping his drink while pretending that Drelmexa didn’t exist and only once she had staggered around putting things away did he pay her any mind. He nonchalantly set his mug down and walked over to her.

“Are you feeling alright,” he asked.

She shrugged her shoulders. “Eh.”

Not the response he was looking for, Vexen sighed and put his hand on the back of her shoulder, gently pushing her out of the kitchen and towards her room. He walked her all the way there and gave her a look before leaving that seemed to say ‘we will never speak of this again’.

Drelmexa shucked off her coat and boots and quite literally fell into bed before drifting off to sleep.

The next morning she woke up completely fine but Marluxia was in a considerably worse state. She certainly remembered everything that occurred last night but wasn’t sure Marluxia knew more than the fact that he was drunk. He didn’t want to speak of it, based on the intense glares he gave Drel throughout the day. The only thing that made her believe that he remembered any of the conversation at all was the fact that whenever he thought he wasn’t being watched, he would look to himself and then to either Vexen or Xemnas, squinting before solemnly nodding and walking away.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Prompted by this ungodly statement that came into existence during a discussion on height/size comparisons: "Marluxia too thick too juicy. Saix unable to curb stomp”


	3. Two of a Kind

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Demyx agrees to take over a job for Luxord.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so sorry about the formatting. I originally uploaded this at 2am and didn't check it over. Hopefully I've fixed everything since then

Luxord came back looking slightly worse for wear but his normally smug expression remained. He strolled over to Saïx and handed him a piece of paper.   
  
"Well, I didn't like it. I'd prefer it if I never had to go back," he said honestly. "The things there are weirder than the ones in Wonderland."  
  
Saïx sighed as he looked over the report. "Duly noted. Wait. A singing....crab? Luxord did you go to Atlantica by mistake," he asked, rubbing his temples. This was not turning out like he thought.  
  
"No, no. This was exactly where you told me to go. The person I was supposed to see wasn't what we expected."  
  
"He was a crab," Saïx asked incredulously. "I find it hard to believe that something with a name is a crab."  
  
Luxord blinked at Saïx. "All we had to go on were rumors from other things that lived there—  none of which were human by the way. None of them said that he wasn’t a crab. Besides, doesn't the crab from Atlantica have a name?"   
  
Saïx watched his point get ripped from his fingers and sighed again. Luxord was right about the fact that all they had to go on were rumors, though he wasn't totally sure about the crab with a name in Atlantica— he had managed to avoid going before he decided to assign Demyx to every mission there. "Alright, then we'll have Demyx do it. It should be fine."  
  
The blonde man grimaced. "You may want to have him go soon. I didn't exactly talk to the crab, if you read any further."  
  
A quick eyeroll and Saïx went looking around for someone unfortunate enough to suffer his wrath. He didn't have to look very far because there on the couch was Drelmexa, reading a book.  
  
"Drelmexa," Saïx began with a sardonic grin, "would you bring Demyx here? He's got another assignment."  
  
Drelmexa put down her book and raised an eyebrow. "You're trusting him with something," she asked as she slowly got up and turned to face him. "You know that's a bad idea— hey, why isn't Luxord getting Demyx, he's right there!"  
  
"Because," he said through gritted teeth, "Luxord needs to explain to me why he didn't speak to the giant singing crab."  
  
Barely stifling her laugh, Drelmexa pushed her glasses back onto the bridge of her nose and walked out of the room.   
  
Luxord gave Saïx one of his signature charismatic smiles. "I don't have to explain why, that was just to annoy Drel, right?"  
  
"No," he chuckled darkly, "You most certainly do. This could have been done already but you're having me get Demyx to do it, meaning that I will have to bother him incessantly only to receive half-done reports."  
  
Luxord closed his eyes and took in a deep breath. "Well, you see—"

 

* * *

 

Drelmexa held her laughter in while she left the room but as soon as she got around the corner and down the hall she snorted loud enough to grab Xigbar's attention, which was equally unwanted.   
  
"Not very princess-like, there. What's got you in such a mood," he asked with a smirk.  
  
She quickly stood up straight and tried slowing her breathing back to normal. "There happens to be a problem...."  
  
Xigbar narrowed his eyes. "What kind of a problem?"  
  
"One—" Drelmexa struggled to keep an even tone. "One that involves—" A puff of air escaped her lips before she could stop it.

Xigbar stood stock still, vaguely worried about Drelmexa’s mental state. Normally he wouldn’t care one way or the other but if there was a “problem” and Drel was unable to keep her cool about it, it couldn’t be anything good.

“It involves,” her voice came from the very back of her throat, pinching the sound and making it rise in pitch, “a giant, singing crab!” She managed to rush the last part of her statement out of her mouth before collapsing against the wall into a giggling fit.

The older man didn’t know what to do; there was a woman in front of him who issued such an odd string of words and was now very hoarsely squeaking out breaths so short he thought she might hyperventilate.

“Princess….d’you wanna explain or am I gonna have to guess at what that means,” he asked, hands on his hips.

Drelmexa waved one hand at him and slowly pushed herself to stand up, soundlessly laughing the entire way. She cleared her throat and looked Xigbar straight in the eye as she readjusted her glasses. Her face had returned to its normal indifferent expression.

“There’s been a report of a giant singing crab,” she began, one corner of her mouth twitched upwards for a moment before falling back into place. “I’m grabbing Demyx so he can take care of it. You seen him?”

Raising his eyebrows and giving her an incredulous blink before pointing her in the direction of the kitchen, Xigbar made it a point to not go in the direction that Drelmexa came from. It would be best to avoid this “giant singing crab” drama at all costs.

 

* * *

 

Drelmexa walked back into the Grey Area with Demyx in tow; he was obviously excited to be going out on another “fun” mission whereas she was quite happy to sink back into the couch and continue her earlier reading.

“So! Whatcha got for me,” Demyx asked cheerfully, rocking back and forth on his heels.

“No doubt Drelmexa has already apprised you of the situation,” Saïx said, casting the woman a sidelong glance.

She merely gave him a thumbs up over the back of the couch without bothering to look up from her book.

He scoffed and addressed Demyx directly. “You are to go and speak to Tamatoa. Find out as much as you can.”

“Yeah sure,” Demyx smiled, “No problem!”

Luxord stepped up and clapped his hand on the younger man’s shoulder. “You’ll just love the place. It’s got bright colors, singing, they’ve even got a sea theme going down there. Lalotai is like a second Atlantica.”

Demyx was smiling right up until the end when suddenly all the color drained from his face and he looked between Saïx and Luxord with wide eyes. “W-wait. You s-said….L-la-lalo-t-tai,” he sputtered.

“Yes. And,” Saïx disinterestedly questioned.

“You mean you want me to go,” Demyx hissed, “to The Realm of Monsters!” His voice squeaked at the end of his statement, making everyone in the room flinch.

Drelmexa shrugged from her spot on the couch. “Dem, it can’t be that bad. I mean look, Luxord couldn’t stand to stay there and actually finish what he was supposed to—”

Luxord leveled a slight glare in her direction.

“So that means it’s perfect for you,” she finished.

“Or,” Demyx shouted, “It’s because he was too scared and everyone wants me to go out and watch me come running back here before I die! You all think this is hilarious don’t you? Well I’m not doing it! Nuh-uh. No way!”

Just when Saïx thought he couldn’t get any more fed up with the situation, Demyx was able to prove him wrong. His features drew back into a grimace and he calmly handed Demyx what used to be Luxord’s paperwork.

“All you need to do,” he pointed to a sentence right near the top of the page, “is talk to this crab named Tamatoa. Nothing else.”

“Yes, it’s fine,” agreed Luxord, “I just….well….you know how seafood and I don’t really get along, you know?”

A quiet snort was heard from Drelmexa. “Right. Won’t forget that anytime soon.”

Saïx ignored both Luxord and Drelmexa in favor of pushing the paperwork. “You can’t miss it. It is apparently—” he glanced back at the paper, “—‘very large. Giant, in fact.’”

“I don’t care, I’m not gonna do it!”

“Okay, let’s put it this way,” Drelmexa sighed as she put down her book for the second time and turned backwards on the couch. “Why won’t you go?”

Luxord looked at Saïx and shrugged. This was turning out to be more of a disaster than either of them had thought.

“Drelly—”

She cringed.

“It’s the Realm. Of. Monsters. Do you know what lives there,” he asked, waving his arms for effect.

“Monsters,” she flatly asked.

“Yeah,” shouted Demyx, “Monsters! I’m gonna run into monsters there! You know I’m squishy! That’s what monsters love! I’m not gonna make it out of there if I go!”

“Now wait a minute,” Luxord interjected, “I was there and I saw maybe two weird things that I would call ‘monsters’. The rest were just that— weird.”

It was Saïx’s turn to jump into the conversation as he eyed Luxord with suspicion. “Strange….I don’t see any mention of other creatures in your report,” he said. “Care to elaborate on that as well?”

“I didn’t think it was necessary,” Luxord said matter-of-factly as he fumbled for an excuse. “We had already been around there and known about these things, I thought it would be a waste of time to go over it again.”

Drelmexa spoke up again. “Demyx. You’re not incapable of defending yourself, you know this, right?”

“I mean yeah but MONSTERS, Drelly! I don’t know how to protect myself from those! I don’t even know what they look like! Heartless I can deal with….most of them are kinda cute, actually. But not monsters!”

“Just stay away from the plants and the strange bats and you’ll be fine,” scoffed Luxord.

In a strange moment of camaraderie Saïx joked, “Oh, so not unlike Marluxia’s hall.”

Both Luxord and Drelmexa smiled at his comment but Demyx was still less than convinced.

Sighing, Drelmexa peeled herself off the couch and walked over to join the standing group. She put her hands on Demyx’s shoulders and gave him her best smile. “Demyx, you’ll be fine. It’s just like Atlantica.” She gave him a pat. “And you love singing crabs,” she added in for good measure.

“Have _you_ ever been there,” pouted Demyx.

“No, but I _do_ trust Luxord. If there was anyone here right now that you would trust it would be—”

“It would be you, duh!”

She grimaced and shut her eyes, trying to choose her next words carefully. “Thank you, but you see, _I_ trust Luxord. He’s an honest man. Which means, by proxy….”

“I trust him,” Demyx sighed.

Luxord and Saïx stood behind the two, dumbfounded at how simple the exchange was.

“I guess I can go. I mean, if it means that much to you.”

Drelmexa smiled. “Yes, Demyx. That would be great if you did.”

“Oh fine,” Demyx whined as he grabbed the papers from Saïx. “But you owe me one, Drelly.”

“You know what, sure. I totally do.”

Demyx perked up. “Wait, what. Really? That worked?”

“Just this once,” Drel said, holding up a finger and winking at him.

Puffing out his chest, Demyx put on a smile and marched off into the corner and opened a portal. “Okay, I’m going….really gonna do it,” he called back to the three.

“Yep. Go get ‘em, Dem,” Drel called back.

His smile wavered as he stepped through but he went nevertheless. As soon as the portal was gone, they all heaved a collective sigh of relief.

Drelmexa immediately rounded on Saïx and pushed a finger into his chest. “You owe me,” she scowled.

Saïx met her vitriol with his own. “For what? Doing your job,” he sneered back.

“No, for the emotional labor I put in to fix this mess!”

“That’s par—” 

For a moment the anger left both of their faces as they blinked at each other and turned to find the actual source of the problem trying to sneak out of the room.

“Luxord!”  
“Luxord!”

 

* * *

 

"Hey, anyone seen Magic Mullet recently," asked Xigbar.

Everyone else in the room looked around and shook their heads. It was a little past dinner and a number of people were sitting in the Grey Area, chatting and snacking on whatever leftovers they chose. Axel was the first to speak.  
  
"Nah. Last I saw he was....in his room, I think." He tried to recall where exactly he had seen Demyx but it had been a good number of hours ago.  
  
Drelmexa waved a hand in front of her and grunted. Her mouth was still full of sandwich and she tried to quickly swallow what she could.   
  
"Oh no," Marluxia scoffed, "Everyone wait, the barbarian wishes to speak but is unable to adequately do so."  
  
Xigbar stifled a laugh and rolled his eye. Across the room, Vexen tuned into the conversation and also took the moment to admonish the younger woman.  
  
"Drelmexa, we've talked about this. Whatever it is can wait."  
  
Looking up from his cup of tea, Xaldin surveyed the people sitting around and gave Drelmexa a quizzical look. "Didn't Demyx go out on a mission today?"  
  
Finally finished chewing her food, Drelmexa nodded enthusiastically and swallowed. "Yeah," she gasped, "That was what I wanted to say. I convinced him to take over a job Luxord squicked out of."  
  
"I caught you on your way to get him, Princess. That was forever ago. Guy should be back by now, ya know," explained Xigbar.   
  
"Probably got distracted by something or other on the way. Are we really going to be surprised by this,” Xaldin said and went back to his book.

A collective hum of agreement resounded throughout the room. Marluxia nodded his head but turned toward Drelmexa.

“Now then, where did he go?”

“Oh,” Drelmexa sighed. “Lalotai.”

Axel cocked his head. “Where is—”

“Where. Is. Demyx.”

Everyone sat up a little straighter in their seats as Saïx stormed into the room. No one said anything, only the shifting of fabric was heard from a shrug or a shaking head.

Saïx paused to take in who was in the room and he narrowed his eyes as he honed in on Drelmexa, who had been sitting next to Marluxia. After a brief moment of panic, thinking Saïx was looking at him, Marluxia smirked and shut his eyes waiting for the proverbial axe to fall on the woman next to him.

“Drelmexa,” snapped Saïx. “Where is he?”

She looked him straight in the eyes, her voice deadpan. “I haven’t seen him. We were all actually just discussing how we hadn’t seen him recently.”

Both Xigbar and Axel grimaced at Drelmexa’s choice of words; the implication that they knew something was going on didn't make them look good as they were usually already on thin ice.  
  
Xaldin watched the confrontation between the two and noted how odd it was. Of course he'd seen both of them snarling at one another before but this was a strange sight. Both very obviously found the other contemptible but while Saïx was almost seething, Drelmexa remained calm yet defiant in her nonchalance.  
  
Marluxia was almost dismayed at the lack of snide remarks but knew the conversation wasn't over. He chanced a glance over at Vexen who he was sure would be having some kind of reaction. A scowl crossed his face when he saw that the scientist wasn't quaking in fear or anger. It seemed he wouldn't be having any entertainment this evening.   
  
"So no one in this room has seen him since he left nearly 5 hours ago?"  
  
"No. I'm fairly certain that's what I implied with my previous statement. Have you maybe asked Luxord?”

The two continued their staring match as they spoke.

“I have not. If he has not seen Demyx come back, you both are going to look for him,” he glowered. “I’ve seen missions run late but this is unacceptable.” And with that he stormed out of the room.

After hearing the footsteps fade away completely, the group heaved a sigh of relief. Vexen glided over to the couch behind Drelmexa.

“What happened today,” he asked. “I don’t think I’ve ever seen him so upset over losing Number IX.”

“No,” Marluxia interjected, “I would’ve thought he would be overjoyed.”

Axel’s face fell in a half frown. “Come on, he’s not _that_ bad.”

“Yeah,” agreed Xigbar, “Give the dude some credit. He deals with Atlantica because no one else will.”

Drelmexa waved her hand dismissively. “Essentially that’s what this was supposed to be. Luxord didn’t like the world he was sent to because it was too similar to Atlantica for his tastes.”

A few snickers were heard.

“So naturally, who would be sent out to finish things up but Demyx….But I guess he went AWOL along the way?”

“You don’t think….” Axel said, his expression grim.

“Nah,” Xigbar and Drelmexa both dissented.

“He’s smarter than that,” said Xigbar.

“He would’ve run back here at the slightest indication that he was in danger,” Drelmexa added.

“Good point,” hummed Axel. “But then what _is_ he doing? And Drel, what's got you handling Saïx so well?”

Drelmexa shrugged and decided to try and finish what remained of her food before Saïx could come back and likely drag her away. “Me? Coffee. Had some more about an hour ago. As for Demyx....dunno,” she said around a mouthful, “Currently it’s not my problem and I’m not gonna worry about it until it is.”

She mentally cursed herself for saying that out loud because she knew that would come back to bite her sooner than she would like. Not to mention she just knew Vexen was glaring daggers into her back for speaking while still eating. She opted to pretend like nothing else existed and continue her meal, missing the fact that Saïx walked into the room dragging Luxord behind him.

“Drelmexa.”

The woman didn’t look up from her food as Marluxia waited giddily for the showdown he was denied earlier.

Saïx raised his voice, intonation matching his expression and exasperation with the matter at hand. “Drelmexa!”

Startled, Drelmexa snapped her head up as her eyes darted around the room, searching for the source of her name. Once she spotted Saïx and a sheepish-looking Luxord she relaxed back into her usual tiredness.

“Couldn’t find him, then,” she said more than asked.

Luxord noticed that Drelmexa’s unnerving calm was further irritating Saïx, he spoke up before the situation could get any more heated. “No. We have to go out looking for him. I’m ready as I’ll ever be, if you are?”

Once more, Marluxia sunk back into the couch. He considered crossing his arms or maybe pouting but decided better of it.

Drelmexa heaved a particularly large sigh before standing up and straightening out her coat. “What kind of strange sea creature do I have to be this time,” she asked Luxord in favor of completely bypassing Saïx’s mood.

“They have humans there, we’re fine as-is.”

“Yeah, they have humans on Atlantica, too,” retorted Drelmexa. “That didn’t stop me from having to turn into a half-octopus woman.”

The few quiet snickers and scoffs heard from the others in the room made her eyes roll. Marluxia decided that would have to do as he definitely wasn’t going to be getting anything more entertaining tonight.

“Do _not_ make me send someone else out,” growled Saïx. “I don’t even care if the mission is done at this point, just get him back here immediately.”

A quick glance at Luxord told Drel that he was going to let her handle the talking - probably for the best at this point.

“Trust me, there won’t be any side stops.”

“There may not be any side stops,” Xigbar called out, “but can you keep your cool around a….a….what did you say— oh right! A giant singing crab?”

She chose not to acknowledge Xigbar’s comment and opened a portal for herself and Luxord.

“Shall we?”

Luxord groaned. “Let’s get this over with.”

 

* * *

 

It didn’t take long after entering the world for Drelmexa to catch on to why Luxord wasn’t crazy about the place. It was as if Atlantica met Wonderland and that made for a host of weird problems; the sea was up, you were down, monsters were everywhere, and you couldn’t tell what was alive and what wasn’t.

They wandered around, not straying too far from each other - if they got separated here their meeting back up would be unlikely at best - until they heard something strange.

Luxord froze and held out his arm to stop Drelmexa from moving forward. “Is that….a guitar,” he asked incredulously.

“No….” mumbled Drelmexa. “That’s a damned _si_ tar! Come on!”

Stumbling around obstacles, the two followed the source of the music as best they could. Drelmexa threw all caution to the wind when they came upon a large cave and ran right in. Luxord hesitated slightly but followed her lead.

The music abruptly stopped and suddenly Drelmexa found herself being lifted into the air.

“Now wait, what do we have here? Another human?”

Drelmexa hadn’t found the source of the voice with her twisting around but she was sure that whatever owned that voice was _big_.

“Yeah but I _know_ that one,” called a familiar voice. “Hey Drelly!”

She finally stopped struggling long enough to take in everything around her and she didn’t like what she saw. They were in a cave. A very shiny, very large cave. And there was Demyx, sitting on a ledge about 10 feet above her current position, sitar in hand waving down at her and beaming.

“You were right, this place is great!”

“Dem, you’ve been gone for hours,” Drelmexa explained, waving her arms for emphasis. “Saïx is so pissed.”

“Oh no, he didn’t send you here to get me, did he?”

The disembodied voice rang out again. “Another human?! Do I have a sign out front that I don’t know about?”

Drelmexa looked over and saw that Luxord was also being held in the air but this time she was able to follow the…. _claw_ that held him. The owner of the voice was indeed a giant crab, just like the report said.

“Don’t worry Tamatoa, I know that one, too,” Demyx said cheerfully.

“Oh, you’re Tamatoa,” Drelmexa nervously laughed, trying not to anger the thing dangling her above the ground. “It’s so wonderful to meet you.”

“You’ve heard of me,” asked Tamatoa, both eye stalks turning to look at Drelmexa.

After a brief moment of panic she forced a smile and answered. “Yeah, you sing great by the way!”

Luxord went wide eyed and frowned, obviously knowing something she didn’t. Tamatoa, however, lowered them both to the ground and smiled proudly.

“Of course I do,” he preened. “Why don’t you stay a while and listen.”

Drelmexa hesitated. “I’d love to but I really need to be getting Demyx back home. Past his curfew, you know?”

“If we take any longer Saïx might send someone else out here,” added Luxord.

“Awwww,” groaned Demyx. “Drelly, come on! Please? Stay for a song?”

“Dem, we really should—” She gave him a stern look but he was prepared.

“I’m calling in that favor,” he smiled. “You stay and listen - you don’t even have to sing if you don’t want to - but you stay for one song, okay?”

Drelmexa grimaced and knew that she couldn’t back out of this one without totally ruining his trust in her. Luxord looked at her like she was insane for even considering staying and inconspicuously tugged on her sleeve.

“Drel, you’re not seriously—”

“Alright, Demyx. We’ll stay for one song but after that we really do have to go.”

“Yes!”

 

* * *

 

It had only been a day since the Lalotai blunder but everyone was already hating Luxord. Ever since Demyx had come back he hadn’t stopped singing. He had even started making up new songs to bring back to Tamatoa.

Marluxia passed Drelmexa in the hallway absentmindedly mumbling a song under her breath and a few hours later the tune had wormed its way into his head. No one was immune, even Lexaeus was heard humming it by the end of the day.

Saïx wasn’t sure if he should ban Demyx from going there again or make sure that all of the Lalotai missions got reassigned to him, he just wanted the singing to stop….and to never hear the word ‘shiny’ ever again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I started this back in June and never fleshed out the idea until a few months ago.....then promptly forgot to finish it. Fun fact: this is the second time I've created a joke with Luxord and not actually made note of what the heck it was. Apparently past-me had some sort of seafood/water-world joke going but I haven't got a clue anymore. Also if you're wondering about the weird voice descriptions near the beginning, please watch that one video of the news anchor losing it over the overweight cat that likes to swim; that was the inspiration.


	4. Two of a Kind?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Is that....pity?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> An extension of MtaE's 3rd chapter. Since it's not from Drel's pov I thought it should go here.

After guiding Drelmexa to a room of her choosing, Xigbar headed back to Xemnas’ room for what he hoped would be a short debriefing. Upon entering, he found Saïx still speaking with Xemnas and they both turned to look at him, Xemnas being the first to speak.

“So,” he began, “you did not get her on board before bringing her here?” It was more a statement of fact than a question but the intonation remained. “It is unwise to let people in without first knowing they won’t immediately defect.”

_ Oof. Didn’t expect that right off the bat. _

A shrug and a sheepish-yet-cocky grin from Xigbar and Xemnas knew the man had no remorse nor regard for standard practice— but at this point it was to be expected. Especially after last week….

Xigbar stepped further into the room. “Yeah, see? I’m pretty sure I know she’s smart enough to join up with us.”

“Your reports stated that she was docile,” interrupted Saïx, “and yet you come back injured, carrying her.”

“She always kept to herself, I didn’t know she was gonna fly off the handle.”

“You didn’t research properly,” Saïx grumbled. “You never do….” he mumbled quietly.

“Of course I did! I knew everything about her daily routine, how d’you think I was able to catch her off guard?”

Still somewhat weary from the week before, Xemnas rolled his eyes and took in a deep breath. “Xigbar, you’re dismissed.” He didn’t want an escalating verbal scuffle in his room; elsewhere was fine but not here.

“Right,” said Xigbar, shooting a mischievous look at Saïx before turning to leave.

“Not that I doubt your methods but why would you name her so soon,” Saïx asked Xemnas. “We don’t even know if she has the power to manifest a weapon, much less a keyblade."

“She had fought recently and made it back here without fading. I would go so far as to say that is a fair indicator of her abilities.”

Xigbar, still in the room, interrupted. “Once you name it, you start gettin’ attached….I would’ve waited a minute before doin’ it.”

Xemnas only smiled. “Have you not already given her a nickname?”

“Alright, fair point.”

Saïx balked at Xigbar. “What?”

“Hah, yeah….she was puttin’ up a real fight and actin’ like she was in charge so I started callin’ her Princess.”

“It’s been 15 minutes!”

“You know I’ve been watching her for longer than that! ‘Sides, what’s got you all worked up about her?”

“Her attitude is less than—”

“‘It’s been 15 minutes’,” said Xigbar through a smirk. 

“The basis of someone’s personality doesn’t change drastically in a few months’ time,” 

This statement had both Xigbar and Xemnas smirking. “Really now,” Xemnas drawled out with a pointed stare.

Saïx knew that he had tragically backed himself into a corner and the best thing he could do was acknowledge he was wrong and leave….or endure more teasing and mockery. How much pride could a Nobody have?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Inspiration line: "Once you name it, you start getting attached to it. Now put that thing back where it came from or so help me-"  
> On a different note- I'm sure there's some funky undertones in this that I didn't notice while writing, don't read too far into it, it's unintentional. There's *one* undertone in this and it won't come about until the end of MtaE.


End file.
